Nine Worlds 2015

I went to the Nine Worlds convention a couple of weeks ago and had a really positive experience.

Now, I wasn't sure if I was going to do any cosplay at all there. As I said a few months again, I was going to get a Star Trek dress from a friend of mine which unfortunately fell through as she couldn't go any more plus time constraints and I needed to get some boots too. I did have a TARDIS themed cosplay ready for the other convention that fell through though (still waiting to hear about that) so I still chucked it in my bag along with some other stuff just in case.

This convention is extremely welcoming to all types of people and, as I said last year, there were quite a few crossdressers there and even more so this year. This wasn't restricted to cosplay though as come the Saturday afternoon and evening I would see more guys in geeky dresses, leggings, playsuits, tops and skirts and nobody batting much of an eyelid about it. This made me think a lot about my own situation and whether I should do anything about it since I had some clothes with me. I used to think that even if the societal rules did change within my lifetime then I wouldn't be of much use to take advantage of them but as I looked around me that evening I realised that the world was already changing and maybe I hadn't missed the boat after all. Plus, change doesn't just happen overnight; it needs people standing up for themselves and living how they want to in order to make other take notice. We are only here for a short time so you might as well make the most of life while you can and live it how you want. Trouble is, that's easy to say, even easier to type, but not so much when you get the fear and paranoia creeping in. Conventions are one thing but walking through some towns at midnight or getting caught on a bus with a bunch of yobs is another. Sometimes you have to take those knocks though. Oddly enough, this is one area that doesn't affect me that much. I can be overly sensitive about a lot of things but my crossdressing I've always been able to front out perhaps because I'm prepared for it. I know that I'm putting myself in harm's way and I know why I want to. Because fuck it, that's why.

So anyway, come the Sunday and I had all this swimming around my head. I knew I wanted to do something but what? I began to think that cosplaying would still be hiding it a way. Maybe I should just wear the skirt and some tights, come out properly. In the end I went with the cosplay and my TARDIS costume (t-shirt, blue skirt, blue tights, blue Chucks and a blue wig. No make-up though) after a quick shave of my legs. Now, a lot of my friends have seen my previous costumes but there were a few there that hadn't and it was their reaction that I was dreading most of all and the reason why I hadn't done it earlier. Their reaction was the the usual "what the fuck?" but very positive...and my photo went up online which is something I genuinely hadn't counted on. I should have expected it but for some reason it didn't occur to me. I now wish I had the guts to do it on the Saturday which was the busier day of the two. I had some really positive comments from others and even had a long discussion with someone about my outfit.

It did give me an overwhelming confidence boost though and I was very much at ease walking around the convention dressed how I was. Not overly fond of the wig though but that can always be changed for another time. Maybe I should go all decora girl and put a lot of Who themed hair clips and bows and stuff in it. I even had a brief fantasy of a girl putting my long blue hair in pigtails. As I went back to my room to change for the night, I even had cause to go to reception still clad in my costume to complain about the fact my keycard didn't work. Took the wig off though but regretted it as it got caught in the zip of my bag. That's another thing as well, I'm considering maybe getting a smaller TARDIS themed bag. Maybe a key to put around my neck as well. Not sure how many more times I'll use the same costume though as I'm always looking to do other things but it was fun.

I fretted so much about my costumes for this convention because I didn't want to squander the chance I had and ended up forgetting about the other good stuff: the talks, panels, entertainment and just having a drink and a laugh with friends but as I said earlier, it had given me renewed confidence and vigor for continuing to crossdress. Maybe one year I won't need a costume or character to hide behind.