I had a task to do at work that I kept putting off and once I completed it, I wondered why I had put it off for so long. It got me thinking about a lot of stuff. Fear has always held me back when its come to romance and that fear ends up turning into self-loathing. Whenever I went to a club I always wanted to be a woman just sitting on a high stool, perhaps a long red dress, just waiting for someone to come up to her and talk. It's the starting point that I just need.
Anyway, off to the convention tomorrow. I'm not back at work until Wednesday and I have 3 days of drinking and star spotting to look forward to. I know I'm going to be nervous about my costume but hopefully I'll get through it.
Seriously, and knowing you won't get this until after you rock the convention, I now exactly how you feel. Exactly.
ReplyDeleteYou deserve to have a good time at the convention and to look awesome as Amy, I remain deeply jealous, but in a good way.
With regards to women, I ended up using how I wanted to be treated to inform how I treated the woman who eventually became my wife. Basically, my feelings gave me the blueprint to make Tilly feel loved, cared for and generally flattered. I won't say that it was not without some frustrations, I still haven't had that 'sitting in a red dress' moment, but it cured *some* of The Fear.
Respect!
Thanks Joanna although I'm not sure I'm entirely deserving. I have been reading some of your wonderful blog recently :)
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