Nine Worlds 2016

Ok, so I got back from the convention last weekend and I really enjoyed it.

Even though I was sad that some of my friends couldn't make it, it was still a blast and one of the best cons I've been to for years. Of course, if you're reading this I expect you want to know about the cosplay. Well, my nerve has gotten greater with each passing year. Didn't do it for the first year and only managed a quick one on the Sunday the second but this year I had three planned. The first I didn't do in the end which would have been Castiel from Supernatural (no crossplay) but because I didn't have the correct coat and would have been a bit hot in three layers. Still might do it at some point though. I ended up with one that has the merest suggestion of Wash from Firefly.

So anyway, on the Saturday out came my Star Trek dress and the boots and it was as brilliant as I hoped it would be. I initially had a blue wig and I did mean to go for a whole 'blue haired alien babe' vibe but I got a bit tired of it after a while and since I wasn't playing a proper character so decided to ditch the wig and felt all the better for it. In a way, I felt a bit of a fangirl, like this was a proper thing a fangirl would wear to a on rather than just being a costume. It was a nice feeling.

On Sunday, the blue wig returned, luckily, because my purple one has started going bald! Today I went as a Hogwarts schoolgirl from Harry Potter. This was an old costume left over from when a bunch of us dressed as teen Nymphadora Tonks for a party. Bought myself a Hufflepuff headband and a cute necklace to add to it too. This too went down well and I got a lot of good comments simply for the effort.

Luckily the girl I'm dating, who was also there in crossplay at one point, was OK with it. As for anything outside cosplay, I left it for now although I did bring a denim skirt with me. As I've said before, cosplay is one thing but admitting you dress outside of that is another matter altogether so I've put that on the backburner for now. So, all in all, a fun weekend and quite a boost.  

Running and Walking

Suffered a bit of a setback today. My mum saw a photograph of me last weekend and I had to bluff my way out of it. For a moment I thought I was going to have the courage to tell her but I bottled it. Perhaps I'm not as strong now as I thought.  I also brought it up with the girl I'm seeing as she's going to be seeing me in crossplay soon anyway and she kind of laughed it off. Not the full story mind, cosplaying is one thing but outside of that is another.

Should I ever tell my mum though? Maybe I should just keep it hidden, might be the best for everybody but then again it is becoming much more of a thing in my life. A few years ago, if I had to give it up for my partner then I probably would have done but nowadays I'm not so sure I could. I've explored this side of myself a lot lately and have started to make my peace with it. To go back to nothing could be a bit of a blow. I guess nothing's really changed over the last day but that's just the way I'm feeling.

Boots!

Well, I've now taken my first foray into female footwear.

I needed a pair of knee length boots for a cosplay but I've been out of luck due to size. Yesterday, however, I did find a pair in a much smaller size than I thought although I did feel an obligation to buy even if they hadn't fit because I'm sure I felt something rip although no damage done on closer inspection when I got them home. Luckily they fit wonderfully, I tried them on with my costume and it just looks awesome.

Size can be quite odd, as I've found out. Even with men's shoes I think I have pairs in about three different sizes but at least I have something to measure it against now. I don't think I'll start on the high heels just (if at all) but a pair of ankle boots or court shoes, maybe even some Mary Janes would be nice.

I have been getting more confident after last week and I've also wondered if I've influenced anyone the way I was as a youngster. Just seeing one person dressed differently can influence others. That's why I started this blog; to put across my experiences and let others know that they're not alone in these feelings like I wish I would have read when I was younger. I wonder if any of the kids at the party, after seeing me, realise they can dress outside of gender boundary's if they wish, that it's ok.

Summer Party 2

OK, so carrying on from yesterday, the short answer is that I wore the dress.

I wasn't sure if I was going to do it on the day but as time wore on, I shaved my legs and stuffed the dress and some tights in my bag. I wore my normal clothes for most of the day and until I had enough alcohol. The bottom line is that everything was ok. The world is still here.

Most people commented "oh you've changed" and I got some compliments about how nice it was and how I wore it. Only one person asked why I was wearing it. I should add that I never bought a necklace or a bag and only had trainers on (it was fairly informal). One of the younger girls there, about eight years old I think, did say "that boy is dressed as a girl and he mother added, and I will never forget this, "No, that person is dressed as a person." Overall, I really enjoyed myself and at least I know I might be able to do it again.

I had a couple of hours journey ahead of me and I could have changed back but by now I was so confident I just kept the dress on. Didn't matter in the end. No-one said anything although that may have been due to the time of night. So cool as well. I think in the end you just have to walk with confidence.

So yes, that was my weekend and one I doubt I will forget in a long time.